Have you ever been close to taking a Drug Recognition Expert? To some, a drug test is a minefield, something about a test with a door and a cup. Which is open, need we say more.

Remember Jerry from Accounting? He was so convinced that a gallon of cranberry juice would cleanse away any trace of his late night snack which all too often got little carried away with cheese and crackers. Spoiler alert: he got a lesson he didn’t expect about the plumbing system in our office.

Yet what’s the deal with these suprise splash’n’dashes? One minute it’s just another day in the office here, the next you’re dancing your solo with a shaky balance in one hand. Observing with half hidden amusment and endless patience as they still keep a straight face lab technicians are reading you like a book.

Some say putting water in a cup and the feared drug test is as real as a sighting of Bigfoot. But in reality, important function keeping us all honest at work. So they what if they suck a little, that’s how intense moments amongst co-workers is get less intense dramatic breakroom occurences and Kate from HR can still rest easy knowing shes is not moonlighting for earlier mentioned detective.

Still why all the mystery and hushed whispers? It’s a very private matter folks. You don’t need shout out your business and the same holds true for results. Then off in the laboratory there is someone that has a secret collection of funny lab tests (are they really that funny)?

So, when facing the dreaded test or even just smiling at a humorful drug test story told by someone else just remember, if it’s a Monday, you got your test you better be praying. Or your ass just had chili night again.